14 May 2011

Day 27: My biggest regret

I've thought about this one alot over the years. I have a motto that I try to live by "Regret the things you did, not the things you didn't do." I don't have many regrets, I try not to create any because they really eat away at your soul. I know this because the ones I have do that. Of a few big regrets I have one that I consider the biggest because at the time I knew I could have done something about it and I didn't.

My last teaching placement was at a local school with the assistant principal who was the classroom teacher. She was very horrible to me, had no interest in teaching me and expected me to take her class so that she could get on with her assistant principal duties. At the time I knew I should say something to the college and ask to be moved. This was the most important placement of my three years of studies and was going to determine my final grades and ultimately my graduation. If I was moved I would have been behind by several weeks in my work and I didn't want to miss my graduation with my classmates. I was ready for my studies to be over, so I decided that I could just grin and bare it for the few weeks and graduate with everyone else. While I did just that - grinned, bared it and graduated - I had no idea that those few weeks would seriously damage my self confidence in my teaching and in myself. I didn't have the self esteem or the self confidence to stand up for myself and my future career. Hindsight is a beautiful thing, but the reason this is my biggest regret is that I had the notion then that I should say something, get moved, but I didn't do it. I can't help but wonder how differently my life would have been over the last 10 years if I had said something.

1 comment:

  1. This is my biggest fear Heather. Getting a crappy placement. I've got three more placements to go, and another 2 weeks left of this placement and I've been lucky so far. I'll take on your hindsight if I ever end up in the same situation!

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