Me vs the Spider

Last night the worlds biggest spider raced across my bedroom floor. I swear he was wearing a helmet and pulling the finger, he was that huge!

I screamed bloody murder (I don't think I've every screamed that loudly or been that girly before in my life!).

My flatmate JP came racing into my room assuming that I had spotted a burgler outside my window or was being accosted by some hooligan, only to find me on top of my bed screaming "spider" and pointing at my wardrobe.

He dove in, head first, determined to get the wee thing.

After providing a torch and a jandle he found the wretched thing cowering under a shoe and proceeded to smack him (it took numerous attempts) and show the spider off the premises via the great white porcelin bowl.

I was a nervous wreck. It's fair to say that I have a great fear of spiders and that was a HUGE one! JP reckons it was an avondale (sp?) spider - the largest in NZ.

My next concern after all the drama had died down was regarding the spider funeral. Would all his spider mates attend? I sure hope not! And, was he the first of many and I'm lucky I caught him, but unlucky that there will be more? Or was he the last of many and they are already here?! Now you can see why I didn't sleep much last night and spent all of today feeling itchy and tense.

Being an obsessive FBer I made the following status update:

"Heather just caught the worlds biggest spider racing across my bedroom floor wearing a helmet and pulling the finger, so I curled my toes, let out a blood curdling scream that sent my hero of a flatmate racing into my room, diving into my cupboard with a torch and a jandle to swat the thing 7 times before it could be "escorted..." off the premises. I hope none of it's friends come to its funeral."

And proceeded to have the following comments made:

MD: I would have expected JP to join you on a chair screaming ... but hey ;)

Heather: He's a sucker for a damsel in distress :) And thank god for that because if he hadn't I would have gone to work in my pj's tomorrow

MD: Thats awesome. We should give him a medal or something tomorrow. A simple ceremony, but one with feeling & from the heart.:)

Heather: yes, and while you're at it, all you blokes can "de-spider" the rest of the house, cause now i'm petrified that there are more. Imagine if I hadn't seen him and discovered him in the morning! The cats wouldn't have been any good!

MS: Mwhahahaha!! Thats soooo funny!! I would have done the same though!

MD: You're going to trust THAT group of retrobates to do something like that? You do know it will involve either
a) Propane & matches...
b) Paintball guns
c) Tribal masks and handmade bows
d) All of the above

KG: Love it ....

Heather: option c sounds like the most amusing and least damaging to the house, while option a could be the most effective but most damaging. I'm not sure that option b is the happiest medium?! I might bite the bullet and go for option d - the most effective and damaging, but at least there will be no spiders!
Hahaha MS! Now I'm worried that he was either the first of many and the rest are going to attempt the dash or the last of many and they are all already in my room! Don't think i'll be sleeping much tonight!

SS: Nooooo! You should never kill spiders, now you will be invaded by all the moths, flies and ants the spider would've taken care of for you.

Heather: Oh SS, I'd put up with a thousand moths, flies and ants instead of one GIANT spider!

JP: Gas is the answer.

BAH: Let's think about who invited the spider :)

Heather: ooooooo lets not!

BAH: Poor JP, he is a man on a mission :)